Have you ever had one of those days where one thing leads to another, leads to another, leads to another and pretty soon you're doing something not even close to what you intended. It's kind of like those racey photos of Miley Cyrus- one thing leads to another and pretty soon your "Disney cover shoot" turns into "psuedo-naked, crack-whore makeup job, cover of Maxim" shoot. And then you're apologizing to your fans.
It was Sunday. It was sunny. So, I decided, I would do some housework. So I'm folding all of the puke-stained, sand-in-the-pockets, fruit-juice spotted laundry of my adorable children and realize that now really is the time to get a dresser for my youngest baby girl. Well, I purchased her an older dresser a few months ago but it's been so cold I couldn't get it painted to match her room so it's been sitting in the garage gathering a fine layer of dust.
I go to
Walmart to buy some paint and paint it TODAY since it's so nice and warm out. But, I need to wait until the girls go down for their naps to go outside and paint it. It's like moving heaven and earth to get them to nap at the same time, but lucky me, it worked out Sunday. So, once they are asleep I
strongly consider making a strong margarita and reading my book on the deck go to the bedroom to get the baby
monitor to take it out into the garage with me. But, when I get to the bedroom I see some ants on the electrical outlet where the baby monitor is plugged in. I am thoroughly disgusted and proceed to get the
vacuum to suck up these few ants. But as I am sucking up the ants the baby alarm goes off (this is an alarm that goes off if the monitor doesn't sense movement like if your baby quits breathing). So I run to the baby's room and check on her. She's fine but had situated her wiggly little butt to the edge of the crib, so I move her and all is well. I go down to the husband (in his man lair beneath the house) to come check out this ant situation. He does, but in doing so, stubs his toe,
swears loudly like a drunken sailor yells and wakes up the baby. Fine, I go get the baby tennd to her, now that she is fully away, strike the same nap time thing, thank you very much. So husband looks at the ants and decides to
vacuum another couple of them that seem to come out of the outlet. Gross right. And as he does this, he moves the
vacuum and now the
vacuum is sitting right on top of it's own cord and he turns it on and it eats itself. I mean, it eats it's cord. And now we have an outlet full of ants and a
vacuum with it's cord sucked up inside it andthis whole this is really safe. Safe like playing in a lightening storm with an aluminum hat on is safe. So he turns off the
vacuum and now the cord is ruined and the
vacuum is ruined. And now I am on my way to the
Walmart (again), with baby in tow, and we are purchasing a new
vacuum. And we hurry home and husband tries to suck a few more up and then decides let's just call an exterminator.
And the dresser continues to sit in the garage gathering dust. The end.
